The Prologue—London, Sometime Circa 1599
“To be or not to be, that is the question.” Is it not?
Isn’t that what William Shakespeare had on his mind when he penned Hamlet? Well most of us know that, but do you also know what was behind that most infamous of questions?
It turns out that Hamlet was depressed and was contemplating suicide. Why? Because his uncle had murdered his father and married his mother, rendering Hamlet utterly upside down. He couldn’t figure out whether henceforth to refer to the old lady as his mum or his ont.
Well, as you know, and as often is the case, one question begets still another. And so on and so forth. Hamlet couldn’t get it all off his mind. Growing oh so weary, he seriously considered ending it all. No, not the questions. His life. Until he began pondering still another question: Would his circumstances after death perhaps be even worse than what he was now experiencing during life?
Spoiler Alert
No spoiler here. If you want to know the answer to that imponderable question, you’ll just have to buy and read the book. Hamlet. Well, maybe a slight spoiler about where this blog is heading: To the subject of buying and reading books.
Fast Forward To The Present
But, first, let’s fast forward 418 years to the present. “Much ado about nothing” has been made of this oft cited and abused question. In modern times, this question takes many different forms.
Consider, for example, “To do or not to do, that is the question.” To do what, you say. Well if you’re asking me that, it means I still have your attention. Well, sort of. Didn’t I just mention that we’re making our way in this blog to the subject of buying and reading books? Well, I did, barely two paragraphs ago. I even highlighted it. Go back and look if you don’t believe me.
As the English comedian Ricky Gervais perhaps put it best: “You should bring something into the world that wasn’t in the world before. It doesn’t matter what that is. It doesn’t matter if it’s a table or a film or gardening [or perhaps even a thriller novel]—everyone should create. You should do something, then sit back and say, ‘I did that.’” Another Englishman. Perhaps a descendent of William S himself. I think we should call this “The Gervais Addendum.”
Enter . . . The Wife
So, the other night, The Wife and I found ourselves discussing whether it would be appropriate for me to use my blogs—at least every now and then, interspersed among my political musings—to shamelessly promote the sale and reading of my latest novel, THE AMENDMENT KILLER. Ala The Gervais Addendum, “I did that.” Is that not what all spouses end up debating, sooner or later?
My focus, of course, spelled F E A R, was: “If not me, then who?” (Another Shakespearean imponderable, in spite of the fact that Shakespeare no doubt would have said “whom.” I mean, even Hemingway knew better than to say, “For Who The Bell Tolls” and destroy his famous novel before it even began.)
In contrast, The Wife, not quite as invested in THE AMENDMENT KILLER as I, was instead focused on the “shamelessly” part of this issue: “You can’t,” said The Wife, “walk around saying ‘Buy my book, buy my book.’ It’s not only shameless, it wreaks of desperation. What will the neighbors say? What will our friends say?”
But F E A R (of failure) is a powerful impetus. Even if The Wife’s questions were rhetorical, the words setting forth my answer flew out of my mouth before I could even think. “If no one is present in the forest to hear the falling tree, would it make any noise?” If I don’t talk about how great (I think) THE AMENDMENT KILLER is, will it be great? And won’t all my true friends understand and only want the very best of success for me, even if they’ll buy and read THE AMENDMENT KILLER no matter what? Because isn’t that what real friends would do no matter what? Wasn’t that precisely the kind of support young PGA golfing pros Jordan Spieth and Rickie Fowler enthusiastically exhibited this past Sunday when their equally young pal Justin Thomas won the PGA Championship instead of them?
The Wife didn’t seem fully convinced. (But when do I manage to fully convince her of anything?) Imagine, then, how the neighbors and friends might feel in the face of any shameless self-promotion on my part. I needed to rally the troops. I needed an ally. I needed my Spieth and Fowler. And, surprise, surprise, I found one. Actually, I found many, but one blogger in particular made the case for my shameless self-promotion quite well.
Nobody Does It Better (Ian Fleming and James Bond, Two More Englishmen)
You can view in full what blogger Steff Green says at http://writetodone.com/10-ways-promote-your-book/. But here’s the short view of what caught my attention:
“Writing a book is an amazing achievement, one you should celebrate and enjoy,” said Green. “Getting your book from a raw mess of words to [what you hope readers will consider] a polished, publishable entity, complete with a kickass cover and proper formatting, is even more incredible,” Green added.
Green had been blogging about music since 2009. When she self-published her first novel in 2014, she decided to promote it through her existing blog.
Her first observation was she needed to write about what potential readers of her novel might like to hear. After experimenting unsuccessfully with blogging about how to write or market her novel, what she discovered potential readers of her novel really wanted to know about was her, the author. She also concluded that if she could say “Buy my book, buy my book” on her website, there was no reason not to say it in her blogs as well. The key was to do it tastefully rather than obnoxiously.
So, she blogged about what inspired her to write a novel, any novel, but especially the novel she actually did write. She also shared some excerpts from her novel (carefully avoiding, of course, any spoilers. Rather than beg, she simply provided some content that she hoped would encourage potential readers to buy and read her novel on their own initiative. She also provided some backstories about some of the events and characters contained in her novel. She even posted interviews with her more important characters. Hey, no fair. Green was now stealing my thunder; I had been thinking about this make believe “interview” concept for months. That’s what happens when I procrastinate; someone else gets there first.
She also blogged about where and when her novel would be available, and why pre-orders and posted book reviews are so important to an author. After a while, she actually started building a fan base. People were asking her how they could help “spread the word.” “Buy his book, buy his book” certainly has a gentle, more appealing, approach than “Buy my book, buy my book.”
One Down
The Wife seemed to be wavering. “So,” I asked, “what do you think?” Wouldn’t potential readers want to know things like how a Constitutional Convention could be convened (and was convened in THE AMENDMENT KILLER), how the 28th Amendment might read (and how I did actually draft it), why Cyrus Brooks retired from the bench (and then chose to defend the 28th Amendment), and how THE AMENDMENT KILLER might have been different if Cassie Webber had been a Type 2 diabetic instead of a Type 1 diabetic (and what the difference is between the two)?
I’m not sure The Wife was convinced, but, she did finally reply, “Okay, if it’ll make you feel any better, I’ll buy your novel, THE AMENDMENT KILLER, and read it. Again.”
Not a bad start, even if shamelessly. One down, so many more to go.
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